Why judging others

I used to take it personally and now I just tell myself that it is a reflection of them and not me and hit delete. Or even if you have known someone for a long time, it is still not good to judge because in the end, it will still boomerang to you. Instead, we have to help that person overcome whatever negative things you can see.

Everyone judges, but it seems to me that it does lessen with age. Your theories are really in-line with this observation of mine. Typically as we age, we understand who we are as individuals and become more comfortable with ourselves. That would certainly reduce the need to judge others. Yet, I somehow feel it might be better if you just keep it to yourself or just think that you are different from them.

Not all are the same. Everyone is unique. Yes, judging others is kind of like eating Twinkies. I agree with you Stella! Afterwards, the feeling is not nice at all.

I am glad the post is able to help you. Thank you for your feedback and sharing. Often judging people is wrong. One of the philosophers in China, Lao Tzu said that we should always keep an open mind.

Once we begin to form an opinion we become biased and do not see clearly. Judging other people is like that too. I think it comes down to lack of facts as well as information. When we judge based on assumption, we not only hurt the other person, but we end of hurting our morals and character. It is human nature to judge, and at times we have to make judgement about people or situations to protect ourselves, so we cannot stop judging completely — the way we do it and the situation we do it in is the true reflection of who we are.

Totally agree with this post — I believe that how you act to others is a reflection of how you see yourself and how you behave towards yourself. Conscious Living Self-Love. Pin Share Tweet Like this: Like Loading Sheri Hi. You may also like. Cancel reply. MinhNguyen December 11, - I totally agree with you. Razena Tantalisemytastebuds. London Mumma December 9, - What a great and interesting perspective and outlook on how and why we judge others.

Your post totally resonates x Loading Sumit Surai August 22, - I must say I agree with you a lot here. And good analysis. Bites for Foodies August 21, - These are all so very true, although I do believe judging is part of human nature. Emily August 8, - Totally agree! Jenni Petrey August 6, - Totally agree. Ebony Hinton August 4, - Great read because i just had a converataion like this. Kellie August 4, - This is absolutely true. Natasha April 2, - Very reflective article.

Erin Creeks April 2, - I like 4. Tonya B April 1, - This is a real eye opener! Marisa April 1, - You make so many great points. Houx January 31, - I love this post! Felicia January 31, - This is great post! Amrita Basu January 30, - You have a real knack of writing about psychosocial issues. I have lost count of the number of people I have judged this week Loading As human nature we automatically judge someone by their appearance, when we have absolutely no idea about them or their lives and vice versa Loading Andrea Broom January 27, - I totally agree, when we are judging others we are just noticing the imperfections in our own lives and instead of facing them we pick point others.

Tasheena SimplyTasheena. Michelle Malone October 21, - I am guilty as charged…been there. Joanae October 21, - Judging other people is for the unhappy. You never know what demons people are dealing with. LaQuisha Hall October 20, - Lack of information is the best reason on this list!

Antoinette Cain October 20, - This is so on point. Raquel Serrano October 20, - Bonding through insecurity is so real! Tanya Barnett October 20, - I can honestly say, I have been guilty of this with my students. Mimi Green October 19, - Im guilty of judging people for a variety of reasons. I may reach out to someone and offer a kind word and or assistance. Ty Knighten October 19, - This is a great post. CourtneyLynne October 16, - I try my hardest not to judge!!! Sometimes we can be a little radical with others.

Elizabeth October 15, - A thought provoking post, this. Janine Good October 14, - Passing judgment sadly comes naturally to the human race and it is with inner work that it can be toned down and fixed in this society. MyYellowApron October 14, - I needed to read this post today. Valerie Ratliff October 14, - This post really makes you think. Divya Eat. XOX Kintan Loading Pat September 15, - so much wisdom, so much truth! Tae June 24, - So true. Bettina Bacani May 20, - This is a good reminder.

Cara StylishGeek May 17, - Your post is awesome! Judging can really tear another person down and be exhausting. Sarah May 16, - This is such a great post. Abinaya Suresh. Maharshi Ghosh. Sai Prabhas Mallidi. Thank you for completing the registration process successfully. You can now write on any topic of your interest and reach out to millions of TOI readers, as long as your article meets our blog publishing guidelines.

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When we judge, does it reflect others or us? Is there a judgment about judging? We all judge. We are predisposed to this natural tendency; it is part of human nature. But why do we judge? Understanding is harder as it requires deep thinking, patience, compassion, and an open mind. First, we reject, then we project. When we judge, does it reflect others or ourselves? Here are a few ways to do that: Be Open. Before we judge, let us seek to understand with an open mind.

For everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Emotions — do they last long or we carry them over? Judge yourself and you see judges everywhere.

But if you listen to the sound of your own voice, you can rise above doubt and judgment. And you can see forever. You and I, we judge others. And they judge us. We all do it. Sometimes we judge with positive or non-harming intentions. I believe we judge for the first reason because our minds want to simplify the processing of information by putting environmental clues into categories.

For me personally, when I judge for the second and third reasons, I have especially negative emotions and thoughts toward others. I try hard not to judge, and have been doing so less and less, but I still have a ways to go. I used to judge people , especially men, when I learned that they had been unfaithful to their girlfriends.

As soon as I learned about the situation, I would feel resistance and anger building up inside me. I would immediately begin insulting them in my head, and sometimes would actually verbalize it if there was someone to discuss it with. Today, I rarely react like this. I know not to judge someone based on their actions because everyone makes mistakes, and some people prefer to behave in a way not everyone else can relate to.

Thank you for your sharing this info on judging others. I have been guilty of this quite often. As I get older it seems to get worse because I think I know everything haha. I live in an affluent neighborhood where most of the people are quite fit, dress nicely and have expensive houses and cars.

It can be easy to get caught up in that trap along with everyone. The folks that I am surrounded by are also extremely competitive. This is passed down to their children and it can be a very sad situation. Sporting events out here have become almost comical. Anyway, thanks for your wise words and I really appreciate your example of the lady in the gym.

I will try to remember that the next time I try to judge someone. What a helpful blog entry. Thank you. I have sensed insecurity in myself in the form of judging and went looking for a blog that might address it. The part about being curious was so helpful. It seems like it would allow empathy to maybe take the place of the judgement.

So I will be forgiven. Such a beautiful post. I have noticed that I am becoming aware I judge others. The other day , I judge friends for their mistakes in their relationships. How unaware they are and selfish…no coherent,etc. Now, I feel bad myself for being so critical. Great post! Laws act to prevent certain actions, like murder and theft, because we judge those actions to be wrong, and destructive to society.

We can and should judge the actions of an overweight person eating fast food, or a drunk person getting in their car. Their actions may be understandable, but it does not make their actions acceptable, or good. Not a good idea. Judgement is a powerful tool and we need to be careful not to beat other people over the head with it.

I was told tonight that I was a judgemental person. It hit me like a ton of bricks because I felt I was one of the least judgemental people I knew. But was I really? I started to self reflect and wanted to learn more of what being judgemental really meant, so began to search and read. Along the way I ended up here. What an eye opener! Such an insightful blog and thank you to all the other posters for sharing your experiences as well.

A lot of it hit home for me. I will admit that through out my travels I lost some of my empathy and compassion along the way. So thank you all for helping to open my eyes and mind. I definitely have some work ahead of me and I think curiosity is a great place to start.

I am judgemental a lot about appearance. Thank you so very much! Your article has spared me from self torture lasting any longer than it had to. Life has been such a beautiful experience, full of good and bad.

A few years ago, not so much. It feels so much better inside once we reach that place! Those reading this, you can do it!!!

Make a choice to find peace! Be kind to yourself!! Just as you get down on yourself, praise yourself!! Love always wins! Chin up, wings out! Be the person you seek others to be! It all starts with ourselves! Go inside and listen, the answer is always found deep within! I would admit that I have judged. What I feel irritated about, is when others tell me that they have every right to judge another person. I agree with this article.

I am so happy to have come across this article!!! I am 22 years old as of last month and have struggled throughout life with judgment of both myself and others. I have the most judgment around those areas of life in myself and I see it reflected a lot in how I have judged others. Another area is in regards to relationships, I have struggled historically in the past to feel secure in my abilities to be lovable and also in fear of enmeshment or commitment.

I can see much clearer now that the things I would get frustrated in others for was a big mirror to the things I was afraid to work on within myself. I also think that boundaries are important and that by developing a secure sense of self AND boundaries that judgment will lessen. Before I used to let others walk all over me and resentment would build up rather than me just allowing myself to be vulnerable with how I really felt which was hurt or afraid or rejected etc.

Thank you again so much for writing this, it was something I needed to read and remind myself because intellectually knew it from a couple years of research, and this coming up has helped to freshen that seed in my brain. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Over a decade ago, I was drowning in the despondency of yet another workday.

My success as the top regional performer had been numbed by a culture of incessant workplace bullying. In short, I was collateral damage in a company without the process or intention to address my experience. Exhausted from the drama, with an unrecognizable version of myself at the wheel, I intentionally swerved off the interstate in an attempt to take my own life. But in that half-second, my reflexes responded, and I yanked the wheel away from disaster.

As I clipped the guardrail on I , something changed