Why thankful for your children

Their optimism. Small children tend to think the best of people and that the world is a friendly place. They keep us focused. Some days we just want to quit our jobs and go lie on a beach somewhere. Children remind us of our responsibilities and keep us from doing silly, impulsive things. They keep life interesting. They are compassionate. Children naturally have hearts of gold—if someone needs a hug, they give them one without a second thought.

It hurts them at a visceral level to see someone or something suffering. Children—whether baby or teenager—make noise. And lots of it. Intense or lighthearted. Blue eyes or brown. Chubby or skinny. All kids are beautiful—in their own ways. Knowing who their parents are and where they come from can give our children purpose too.

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While both reflect an aspect of how we treat others, children can use manners just by learning a script. The problem in learning scripts for manners for a child too young or separated from meaning is that children satisfy the social grace without experiencing the emotional response or acting upon their own intent.

For example, 4-year-old Beth runs to greet her grandmother. She opens the box to find six pairs of white socks. Teaching manners is a fine art of modeling but not always the making of meaning. Raising thankful children is a fine art of helping them make their own meaning.

Maybe it is a rumpled, crayon-scribbled card. Maybe it is a fresh bouquet of dandelions and a few other weeds from the back yard or local park.

Maybe it is just a warm hug after a cold ice cream treat. Children express some sense of thankfulness and desire to be appreciated all the time. It is our role as parents to model appreciation and reflect those genuine feelings back to the child. I can tell you worked hard on it. Welcome to motherhood! It was such an emotional time. Happiness and fear all rolled up into a huge ball in my belly. Speaking of bellies, mine was growing so fast that my thoughts and emotions could barely catch up.

Before I knew it, I was preparing for the greatest adventure of all time. It will be okay. In their eyes, I rock. Permission to be as silly as possible. I can act silly, which means singing AND dancing in the car with no judgement Newfound cooking skills. Had my kids not come along, I may have never learned how to cook, it would have been fast food city for life. Not to mention when I make spaghetti and meatballs or pancakes they are in awe of my basic abilities.

Cool as a cucumber. I learned how to handle emergencies with a calmness and poise I never knew I had in me. When my kid broke his wrist on the monkey bars it also broke my heart. But there was no time to panic or react without thinking things through.

I will speak up.